So there is a body builder out there named Soren Falby. He is enormous and in excellent shape.
The short story is that his image was used in a meme about mothers, and he didn’t take too kindly to that.
I am not surprised that he did not take too kindly to that. I have learned a few things over the years, and one of those things is that you do not insult someone else’s mother. Even if they are complaining about their mother, you do not join in on the complaining. You say something like “Well, it sounds like you two have a difficult relationship, but it seems like everyone is doing their best to get along!” and leave it at that.
I learned that lesson the hard way, actually, with an ex-girlfriend who was constantly complaining about her mom. To be fair to my ex, her mom was a bit of a pain in the rear—and that is putting it mildly. Abusive might be a better word.
After listening to months of my ex complaining about her mom, I may have told her to stop calling her every day and referred to her mom using a word that starts with the letter ‘B’. The relationship between me and my ex ended shortly thereafter.
You also shouldn’t make fun of other people’s kids; I learned that from an episode of the sitcom ‘Scrubs’. People can make fun of their kids if they want; you are not allowed to do so.
Anyway, Soren did not like the meme, and he pointed that out in a crystal clear fashion. You should listen to Soren; he could easily crush you. He is the most terrifying-looking person I have ever seen, but he is apparently a super nice guy!
1. The One Where He Reacts
It sounds like Mr. Falby has a wonderful relationship with his mother, and good for him. Guys need their moms. I know I sound sort of old-fashioned, but I do think a healthy relationship with a mother figure (aunt, older neighbor, teacher, etc.) is important to the proper development of a young man. The actual mother is probably best, of course, but that’s not always ideal or even possible.
My mom still asks me if I have been to the doctor recently. I find it obnoxious, but it is nice to know someone cares. I don’t go to the doctor, but I did get a flu shot. I took a picture of the receipt with my phone and texted it to her.
Well, that was a mistake. She was happy that I got the flu shot, but I was not happy when I developed flu-like symptoms that lasted for a couple of days. I could barely move! I had a horrible headache, and every muscle in my body hurt. I definitely had a fever. I wasn’t feeling well when I got the shot, which might explain it.
Moms are great, but they are not always right.
2. The One Where He Is In a Dress
I must say he looks pretty good in this dress. It might be the dress. I can imagine certain people wearing it better, true, but I can also see a lot of people who would wear it worse.
I think it is his tattoos that sell the whole thing for me. The dress is sort of plain, but the tattoos bring the whole look together in an interesting way. I am not a fashion consultant, and there probably is not a single person on the planet who thinks I should be one, but I have to say that Mr. Falby here is pulling this off quite well. Good for him!
3. The Other One Where He Is In the Dress
I just do not understand how a human being can have arms as large as that. It seems totally unreal, frankly. I was once sort of into fitness, but my arms never looked remotely like that. Those things are enormous! They are basically the size of my head.
I am also sort of jealous of the dude’s beard. Don’t get me wrong—I can grow a beard. We have all seen the guys that try to grow a beard and simply can’t pull it off. I can pull off a good beard. My facial hair comes in thick; there is no patchiness when it comes to my facial hair.
I just can’t have one that long. I technically could, but I’m sort of a wuss; it gets way too itchy after about five days. I am rocking about five days’ worth of facial hair right now, and I’ll probably have to shower and shave before I go to bed.
The sad thing is that I hate how I look after I shave my face. If you ever watched the medical drama “House”, you know how weird it is to see the main character without stubble. There was that one episode when he had to do so, and it wasn’t the best look. That’s how I feel after I shave. I have one of those faces that look better with stubble. If I shave, I sort of look like a wrinkly infant.
4. The One Where He Explains the Dress
This explains why Mr. Falby was wearing the dress. He was trying to make a point to Malene Larsen, who is a crossfitter. They seem to be a lovely couple.
She is also very in shape. They would make an excellent crime-fighting team. Personally, I would not commit a crime in the city in which they live. That’s just begging for trouble.
The pair are in tremendous shape, but I also feel sort of bad for them. When was the last time they went to an all-you-can-eat restaurant and just consumed everything they could fit in their stomachs?
I did just that on Thanksgiving. There was this buffet thing at a country club, and my parents invited me because they enjoy my company for reasons that I don’t fully understand. Really, ‘enjoy’ may be too strong a word, but you get where I am going with this. Anyway, there was this seafood dish that might have been the best thing ever. There was a lot of lobster in it, so I ate as much as I could. I could tell that the staff was getting irritated, but there was nothing they could do to stop me!
5. The One Where He Loves His Dogs
I find it hard to dislike anyone who likes dogs. Regular readers of my work know that I am a dog person. My dog is an obnoxious pain in the rear, but he is also my favorite creature on the planet! He has such sad eyes. He can also jump really high. From looking at him, you wouldn’t expect it; however, I would not get into a fight with my tiny terrier. He will jump onto the back of the couch and eat your face!
It is clear that the bodybuilder loves the dog, and that’s great. I am sort of terrified of that dog, however. My fear of large dogs dates back about eight years. I had been forced to endure a spinal fusion because my spine decided to revolt against the rest of my body. I was on my way to an appointment with my neurosurgeon, but my old dog needed to pee in the yard before I went. Sadly, however, things were made more difficult as a result of a local couple that decided to let their dog roam free. It was a big dog, and it wasn’t particularly friendly.
The long and short of it is that the big dog tried to attack my small one; as pet owners tend to do, I decided to protect my animal—and I fell to the ground. I had been gutted two months prior and was wearing a back brace, so the fall was a particularly scary one. I thought I was going to end up paralyzed. The good news is that I can still walk. The bad news is that my doctor called me an idiot for protecting my dog instead of my back.
The really bad news, at least for the owners of the big dog, is that I reported them to the state and they ended up losing their dog. The couple divorced shortly thereafter.
6. The Comment About His Being a Role Model
I do agree that this particular bodybuilder is a wonderful role model for children. If you are the parent of a young man, it is essential that you teach him to respect women. I think we can all agree on that particular point.
Sadly, however, not many young men respect the young—or old—women in their lives. The comments I see on Facebook and other forms of social media are truly shocking. I would not want to have to raise a son or daughter in this day and age.
7. The Comment About Fighting Him
I think it is pretty darn clear that almost anyone would have lost a fight to this guy. How would winning even be possible? A well-placed kick to the groin might give you a small chance; I want to make a bunch of dirty jokes, but I won’t due to the fact this is a classy website. I’ll leave it at this: even his groin could beat most of us up.
I am just glad he is a nice guy and is on our side. He looks like the sort of dude who could take over the world if he wanted to do so; instead, however, he is content to hang out with his lady and his animals. I would be happy to grab a cup of coffee with this guy.
8. The Comment About The Joke
I couldn’t fault the guy if he did smack a person for making such a joke. Those jokes are so lame. I remember the first time I heard such a joke. I believe it was in 1998 or so.
I was a kid, but I still found it lame. Insulting someone’s mother just is not cool. That’s like insulting someone’s dog, which also isn’t cool.
I have a dog, and I know he is obnoxious; my neighbor once insulted him, though, and I was ticked. I pointed out to her that her house smelled like a funeral home and her daughter would never find love because she was the most uptight, frigid young woman I had ever met.
I hate to say it—but I wasn’t lying. That girl is kind of scary. She is like a blonde Wednesday Addams, except without any of the warmth. She could never give birth to a baby; her uterus must be like the North Pole.
9. The Comment About the Manly Men
I completely and totally agree. True men are not afraid to express their feelings.
In this day and age, men should not be made fun of for having feelings; furthermore, they should not be made fun of for their taste in television programs. For example, I very much like “General Hospital”, which is a lovely soap opera that has been on the air for well over 50 years.
I also like those goofy romantic comedies made by the ‘Hallmark’ channel. Those films won’t win any Academy Awards, but they’re comfort food for one’s troubled mind. I refuse to apologize! Also, a lot of the actresses are super pretty.
10. The Comment About the Community
I think it is fair to respect the bodybuilding community; I can’t imagine spending a lot of time to get that large, but everyone should be able to do whatever they want as long as they are not harming others.
I think that the social media user named Tung Nguyen was correct: Mr. Falby’s mother did indeed raise a gentleman. Good for that mom!
11. The Comment About The Need to Be Aggressive
I suppose this person has a very good point. If there is a person inside a room who you know can beat the crap out of you, it is unlikely you’ll start trouble. I actually once worked as a security guard. I only looked threatening because I was wearing a suit. Everyone sort of assumed I was armed. I was not, but they did not know that.
12. The Comment About the Beard
I don’t really understand this comment. I was sort of under the impression that beards meant you were a manly man and should be feared.
Have times changed? Should I shave if I want to be feared and respected? That’s a bummer, because I really hate shaving. I always develop an ingrown hair situation, so I look terrible when I do.
13. The Comment About the ‘Gentle Giant’
It seems as if that is what he is. He is a gentle giant. The bodybuilder may look terrifying, and he is to pretty much all of us, but he is a gentle giant.
It seems as if he is in a healthy relationship. He loves animals. He is good to his mom. He’s pretty much the friend we all want; few of us deserve such a friend, though. Good for him.